I'm Late,I'm Late for a very Important date...

I have 5 minutes...Yes! it was a fabulous weekend..No, I haven't challenged the Blog Photo-Gods yet to make them bend to my Will...Jerri had her car broken into...and while she was trying to mold a response to a complaint letter I was taking a nap! When I awoke I thought" Egad! I have dropped the ball here!" This is my help to her in that regard: Dear Mr and Mrs X______, We take customer service quite seriously at my Company and at my Station and so I take your unkind comment about one of my employees like a dagger to my heart, one that is twisted ever so slowly, while you watch the agony in my eyes, the blood gushing slowly down my ample chest.( too many vampire books lately, perhaps?) You see, we obtain our employee's newly born, and plant the seeds of "Customer Service" deep into their newly formed brains, ensuring total obedience, a "You're way better than I am" attitude, and "if I leave my lips upon your ass too long I am truly sorry" smile that will not leave their faces. If one of our emplyee's fails to "graduate" from our Breeding Home, they are immediately sent to work at Airport Ticket Front Desks...a fate one one wishes, I assure you. After reviewing the complaint you sent to My Boss and his Boss, The Washington State of ******, I can only come to one true conclusion..You Sir, are cheating on your wife with Goats, and she does not mind at all, in fact if you were to ask her she would be more that happy to join in...I say this with the utmost authority as I have studied the type of persons, with great detail, that cause such grief over 5 minutes of their time ..5 minutes out of two years, and with that knowledge I have also come to know that you don't give a shit about anything but yourself. Rest assure, The Lane Operator in question will be killed and served at the next "Bite of Seattle". We will supply you to what vendor and booth She (He) will be presented, as you may have the opportunity.....Uhm, maybe it's better She didn't get me to help with this letter of apology...Have a Nice Day..and I'm saying this with a "If I have left my lips upon your ass too long I am truly sorry" smile......no, really